What are the most effective approaches?
- These days networking is sited as the most effective way of finding a new job. So firstly, you need to build your personal network and then persuade the loyal members of your network to introduce you to people who might connect you with someone who knows someone ..........who has a suitable opening for you to fill.
- Secondly, you need to get your CV read and acknowledged. So you need to persuade HR professionals and recruiters to not just read and discard résumé but to consume, digest and ruminate over it.
- Having got as far as the HR dept, you need to persuade the hiring managers that you're the perfect candidate for their organisations. The missing link they have been seeking, even if they didn't realise it themselves
Be convincing - Some people are easier to convince in your job search than others. Getting friends and colleagues to arrange introductions for you doesn't require much persuasive effort because they know you and some may even like you or owe you money. Therefore, they're willing to play their part on your behalf. After all if the circumstances were reversed, you would do the same for them. Your powers of persuasion over your friends should stem from your mutual friendship, natural charm, credibility and likeability, not from your rhetorical prowess or physical strength.
The Gatekeeper - The hiring manager, knows nothing about you, apart from the fact that he has seen your name in a pile of CVs that need to be filtered. He has to create a short list of candidates fit for interviewing and you must be on it. How are you going to stand out from the crowd and rise loftily above the other candidates. You have to think better and work harder to convince them that you're worthy of their time. In such situations, job seekers need the advantages gained from fully understanding the fundamentals of persuasion.
Easy as ABCEffective persuasion combines equal parts communication and observation. It hinges on having good people skills;
- being able to read people,
- being a good listener and
- being empathetic.
You need to be a keen observer of the person you're trying to persuade. Otherwise how can you match the tone and language you use in conversation to the other person's tone and language. Watch how the other person reacts to what you are proposing, either physically, through their facial expressions and body language, or in their tone of voice. If you notice a negative reaction, or discomfort, you should be alerted and quickly change or slightly adjust your approach.
Under your Influence - To be an effective influencer, you also need to be likeable, outwardly open and trustworthy. It doesn't matter whether you're selling an idea, a service or a product, people tend to buy from people. If I like you, I will listen to you. If I don't like you or your message, I won't listen to you. Getting someone to listen to you is the first stage of persuasion.
Persuasion isn't inherently difficult. To do it right, people just need to focus on listening to the person they're trying to persuade and adjusting their communication accordingly.
Whether you're seeking a new job, clinging to an existing one or out to climb higher, persuading people of your value is going to be your key to success, especially during times of low market confidence and recession.
How do you persuade others without appearing pushy and what about the dangers of steamrolling people into submission. The Hard Sell!
What is one of the biggest mistakes you can make when trying to influence or persuade others?
One of the worst crimes you can commit is the lack of true or active listening. Far too many people only half-listen to other people who are speaking and the same people are equally unlikely to closely observe people either. We sentient humans have the capacity to think at four or five times the rate of someone who's speaking. Consequently, we can often listen badly because we're too busy looking ahead and formulating our responses while the other person is still speaking, or we're thinking about something else entirely, like shopping or the size of the other person's nose. We fail to pick up clues that indicate what the other person is really saying or thinking because we are not even listening.
Body Language
Observing body language is the closest we can come to mind-reading. If you make a statement, and that statement produces a grimace or a shift in posture of the other person, their body is telling you that something you said doesn't gel with them. It's a clue for you to change your tact or to inquire what it is that's bothering that person.
Negative pressure
Some individuals lack the level of people skills that are needed to persuade others. However, they can and are able to sway and influence their co-workers by taking a dominant posture. This is observeable, because they always have a response to a point or counterpoint. Their constant pressure exhaust others' patience and endurance, leading to submission. It is more like verbal tennis or squash than persuasion.
Is there anything wrong with this sporty method of persuasion if it accomplishes the persuader's goals?
Clealry. beating someone into submission is not good practice. It is not what we understand to be true persuasion. A truly persuasive person will not leave you in an exhausted state. The ultimate goal of effective persuasion, is that the relationship between the two people hasn't suffered, even after one has changed the other person's belief or behavior. There should be no 'losers' as there are in competitive sports.
Certain personality types are better at persuasion than others?
Extroverted people tend to be more persuasive than people who are prone to introversion. Extroverts are often in people facing jobs, such as sales or advertising, where they have to influence or persuade people to buy a product, take some kind of action or adopt a different lifestyle goal.
Introverted People will take jobs that are less people-focused and more facts and figures focused. They are the back-room people, often evry talented but lacking the self confidence that their knowledge should bring. Therefore, they have less experience of dealing with people than extroverts. Consequently, they don't develop the people skills that extroverts develop. It is a vicious circle that is not so easily broken.
Introverts can be good persuaders, when dealing with other introverts; people of their own type. Introverts have more difficulty in persuading extroverts because extroverts tend to speak louder and faster than introverts. Whereas, the introverts tend to conduct their interactions in a much slower manner.
Extroverts have similar difficulty in trying to persuade introverts. When you look at workplace disputes, some can be attributed to personality clashes between introverts and extroverts.
Logical arguments besides, just do it!
May I also postulate a theory that the extoverts are more emotionally open and accepting of emotive reasons for doing something. Whereas, extroverts may be less willing to expose their feelings to scrutiny and therefore take the safer option of discussions based on known facts. It is easier to dis-arm an introvert using facts and logic than it is an extravert. Discuss!
Is there a difference between persuasion and manipulation? Some people don't like the idea of having to persuade or influence others. It strikes them as unseemly, pushy or manipulative.
Persuasion is essentially about changing someone's perception, questioning their assumptions. You are trying to alter their beliefs and behaviour. Persuasion is really about moving someone from point A to point B.
Manipulation implies coercion. When we're talking about persuasion, you are seeking a win-win scenario, where both parties are happy. Manipulation implies that only one party is satisfied and the other is out-manouvred.
It's all about the approach
Manipulation is often synonymous with some kind of threat: If you don't do this, this will happen. Persuasion is a meeting of minds: You are persuading another to come around to your point of view. Ideally, no one gets hurt. You have simply changed a person's perception, not by coercion or threat.
It is better to have cross-pollination than a cross Polynesian
(old Hawaii proverb, alledgely)
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